TBT #2 - The Litmus Test of Stewardship (or Confessions of a Packrat)

Attending the Springs this weekend and hearing the teaching on Being Rich and recognizing how rich I really am as an American (even an unemployed American), I was reminded of this post from 4 years ago. We have so much.  Honestly, I've lost or squandered more than some people will ever have.  I am blessed and yes, I am rich!

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The Litmust Test of Stewardship

(or Confessions of a Packrat)

I have in my car this little placard that sits on my dashboard.  It's backward, so if you look at it or try to read it, it makes no sense. However, if you're seated in the car looking out the windshield, its reflection reads perfectly.  It has a verse on it to help me meditate on the goodness of God.  The verse right now is 1Timothy 6:17 -

"Command those who are rich in this present world not to be arrogant nor to put their hope in wealth, which is so uncertain, but to put their hope in God, who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment."

Being an average American (maybe being an American at all) qualifies you and I as being rich.  Let's face it, unless you earn less than $62/month, you are wealthier than 51% of the world.  If you earn $63/month or more, you're doing very well.  :)  But wealth is not only a subjective concept, it's also uncertain.  Whoever said "easy come, easy go" was only half right.  Here today and gone tomorrow unless you plan well, so wherever you are on the wealth continuum, you'd better have your hope and trust in the Lord Who is our ultimate Source.  He provides, not just the money, but the job, the ability, the time, the talent required to perform your duty for profit.  As the Psalm says, "all my fountains are in You."  Every source for every thing (physical, spiritual, emotional, etc.) is found in Christ alone, for in Him we live and move and have our being, for from Him and through Him and to Him are all things.  God provides everything, and His purpose for doing so is also the litmus test of our stewardship. 

Staring back at me from my windshield on that crazy placard are the words "He richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment."

Enjoyment?  I had to ask myself, "Self, do you enjoy everything you have?  Is it bringing you joy and pleasure?"  If God gave me all things to enjoy, am I enjoying all things I have?  and if not, why?"  The answers were troubling.  Every time I could think of something in my life that I did not enjoy, it came down to the fact that I hadn't managed it well, it was in disrepair or was neglected.  Every unenjoyable part of my life (past and present) was an area where I had struggled with the principle of stewardship. 

There have been periods of my life when I didn't enjoy tithing.  Why?  Because I was managing money so poorly I was anxious all the time.  There have been jobs I did not enjoy.  Why?  Because I lost sight of the fact that God had me there for a reason and I was ultimately working for Him.  I've had relationships I didn't enjoy because I had either neglected them or neglected the necessary maintenance of forgiveness and honesty.  I've had cars I didn't enjoy and places to live I hated either because they were so broken down and neglected that no one could enjoy them or because I just failed to remember that God gave them to me.  I was ungrateful!

And it's not just the neglected things.  It was also the things I had too much of that I couldn't enjoy.  I have an entire closet in my house of storage that I haven't unpacked in 2 years.  Am I enjoying all those possessions?  No, because I have too much stuff.  It's just as egregiously poor stewardship as not tithing.  I've tied up God's money in things that have no value or use to me.  I couldn't possibly enjoy everything I have, because I have too much!  Wouldn't it be better stewardship to give those things to someone who would actually use them and enjoy them?  I have some serious de-cluttering of my life to do!  I have more than I could possibly enjoy. 

Look around at the richness of your life and ask the following questions: 

• Am I enjoying everything God gave me as He intended me to?
• Has poor stewardship robbed me of the enjoyment He intended for me?  
• Has an ungrateful heart kept me from enjoying what He's given me?
• Do I have more stuff than I could possibly enjoy and therefore need to simplify my possessions?   

Not all fun questions, but the more often I ask these questions of myself, the more likely I am to realize how rich I am, to be grateful, to look up at the needs of others rather than me, and to live a simplified life that finds sufficiency in Him rather than in pursuing more stuff.  

If You've Seen Me, You've Seen My Father

Last night at dinner I was telling stories on my parents when out of my mouth came the voice of my Dad - his words, his tone, his attitude.  It stunned me for a moment, and with  my hand over my mouth I looked at my friend and confessed, "I am so much like my Dad, I'm buying myself a Father's Day card this year."

I'm not sure I want make an official confession of all the ways we are alike, but here's a short list.  He's a poet, a writer, a wordsmith, a thinker, loves to unfold truth in the Bible, a book collector, a collector of interesting things.  He's funny, he's snide, the life of the party if you can get him to go to one, but he's happy to be at home most of the time.  If I am any of those things, I promise you I am a lesser, unrefined version by comparison.  There's much of that list I have yet to perfect to the degree my Dad has, but he's got 30 years more practice than I do.

If you're still not sure you know my Dad, I can only say, "if you've seen me, you've seen my father."  If you know me at all, you have a pretty good idea what he's like.  Pull all of me in the body of a handsome older man, and you have my dad.  As much as it takes me off guard sometimes, I'm pretty happy about that.

Happy Father's Day, Dad!

A Sign, A Promise and An Aunt Tavis - Oh Ge Yishe!

My maternal grandmother and her twin had a baby sister named Tavis.  Today she would have been 91 years old, and I miss her all the time.  She is the one who inspires me to be a well-loved aunt and truth by told,  much of how I interact with my 12 nieces and nephews is based on how she made me feel as her great niece.  She was always so kind, so genuinely interested in how you were doing, engaged with every person in the room regardless of their age or significance, the most likely to throw her head back in shear delight of the presence of little people, the most enthusiastic hello coming through the door.  I miss the sound of her nasally "oh Ge yishe" - her unique and delightful way of saying "gosh".  My cousin Jenny does a spot-on impersonation of her, but it's just not the same.

I'm not nearly as classy as she was, but I like to think we have other things in common.  Some are obvious.  We are both the baby girl of the family.  We neither have had our own kids though we both love them dearly.  I've been single my whole life, and Aunt Tavis spent the last decades of her life single as well after Uncle Jack passed away.  She always made it look easy though I'm sure it wasn't.  She always had nice things, a job, good friends, fierce loyalty to her family; and though I think she struggled at times, she had a air about her that her life was enough.  She was sufficient.  (This list may or may not have digressed into ways we were dissimilar.)

I often look to her and wonder how she made it all those years by herself.  When I'm stressed and wondering what to do, I wonder what she'd do.  Those are usually times when I'm struggling or feel like less than enough, and sometimes God graciously sends me a sign that everything will be ok.

One of Aunt Tavis's favorite things was cardinals.  You would find them everywhere around her house and if you wanted to send the perfect gift or card, you needed only look as far as the one with a red bird on it.  So when I see a cardinal, I think of her and when it's a particularly stressful time, I consider it a sign, a message from her that I'll be alright.

A couple of weeks after I left my job, I had one of these experiences where I was sure she was sending me a message.  It was a day when I was wrestling with what the future would look like and what I ought to do.  Outside my living room window, flew the most beautiful cardinal.

"Oh it's a sign!  Everything will be ok."  I thought with relief.  Just then the cardinal took a dive straight into the window, and proceeded to do so several more times.

Definitely, definitely not the sign I was looking for!  Though less than comforting, it was amusing.

And then I thought, why do I need a sign?  I have a leather-bound letter from my Father full of expressions of His heart for me.  It doesn't say that everything will be ok, but it does say that as my Dad He's not going to give me a stone when I need and ask for bread, nor will He serve snake when I'm hoping for fish.  He knows how to give good gifts to His children.  And more importantly, He's promised to be with us... the greatest gift of all, His presence.

In rare and beautiful moments, He gives you an Aunt Tavis as proof that you are enough, that you can survive and thrive, and life can be full even alone.  Most often He gives us a promise. Sometimes He gives you a sign... or just a stupid kamakaze bird to make you laugh.

Happy birthday, Aunt Tavis!